My Promise to ME!

Over the past few months I've been devouring reading material about living a healthier life, limiting stress, and all that good stuff. At first I thought "oh, this will be simple to learn about". Well, not so much. There are SO many different opinions about the subject... like Oodles and Oodles. I am finding that I have to take what I'm learning and find a way to personalize it all so that it meets my needs and lifestyle in a reasonable manner. While I plan to speak more about this is the future- especially as I figure it out, I want to start this out by making a new promise to myself. 


I take promises to myself VERY seriously. I do not go back on a promise to myself and rarely make them because I know how difficult it can be to keep them. In our culture, most people make promises to themselves at the beginning of each year. However, come January 15th, these promises have long since been forgotten. I think the reason for that is this: those promises are UNREALISTIC and almost impossible to work into their daily lives. If that is not you... Congratulations! It's difficult to keep promises to yourself - right? This year I made several promises to myself around the new year.. as I do every year. However, I make a concerted effort to make sure they are attainable. Here are a few.

Photo Via

1. Floss Daily. 
Okay, some might think- "What? That's ridiculous". Okay, a little story. Every time I go to the dentist, the hygienist will ask me how often I floss. I think she already knows the answer and just wants to make me admit it out loud... like I was really going to say "um, when things are stuck in my teeth". So this time during my check up in November (November 9th to be exact) I made a PROMISE to myself to do what ever I could to floss daily. Well, It's April 5th and I think I have missed a total of MAYBE 5 days! YAY!. Now it's getting to the point where I can't stand not to floss.. crazy!.. ok so moving on!


2. Be a better person. This one speaks for itself. I do not feel like I'm a bad person but there are definitely areas that could use some improvement.

Ok, I just love the look on T's face. He was going through
a very serious phase. So glad we captured that!

3. Get better with my pictures. I'll keep this explanation simple. We have lived in our home for nearly 4 years and there might be 4 pictures in frames around the house. I'm really GOOD at making sure I take pictures, but BAD at having them printed, framed, and hung. So, I made a promise to myself to get better at this. So far, I'm doing MUCH better with this. We even had a family picture taken.. It was the first professionally one we had done.


So, that's where my NEW promise to myself comes into play. 


I promise... to live healthier. 


That promise is an all encompassing one. To walk more. To exercise more. To eat better. To get in touch with my inner peace (how ever you do that! HA!). To let myself feel OK with where I am physically but strive for better. To really take advantage of my youth.


Now, this is not a promise to lose 20 pounds. To starve myself. To not let myself enjoy things that make this life worth living. It's just to do the things I mentioned above. Maybe as time goes on I'll add to it. But for now, that is my NEW promise to myself. And I'm REALLY excited about it. I think I deserve it!


My question for you: Do you ever make promises to yourself? What kind? Do you keep them? 


Have a great thursday friends!


-M

To Each His Own

Well, I can't believe my sweet husband is gone again. It's the hardest thing- saying "Goodbye". A huge part of me wanted to scream "No! Don't go, let's run away together!"or maybe even just lay down on the ground kicking and screaming!  Then I realized either option wouldn't make anything better at all. My husband and I have been together almost 9 years and married 5 of them. Best years of my life yet. 


Marriage and Love are two of the most wonderful and surprising pieces of this life if you are able and/or want to have them. Growing up you hear and see many different ideals about the way those two things should be handled and manipulated in order to make them things that serve your own purpose. We have found that trying to make our marriage and love fit society's definitions of Love and Marriage just doesn't work for us. 


We decided a long time ago, like before we were officially and item, that we wanted to let this relationship be real. Be true. No games. We decided that if we were going to try this thing out that we were both going to give it everything we had. Both of us had been in failed relationships that just seemed so wrong on many levels. So, when we met each other we were both in places that allowed us to be real with one another. SO glad about that.


Of course, as many know, this is the true beauty of relationships. To each his own. In my opinion, no truer words have been spoken about love- or anything for that matter. And while we live our love one way, that doesn't mean there aren't a million other ways to make it work. We have just found a rhythm that works for us. 


As we grow in our love for each other, we find that there are so many more dimensions to love than either of us ever expected or even thought to think about. It's more than just that ga-ga, head over heals, can't get enough of you stuff. And thankfully it is! There are times when yes... I've had enough of him. Need room to breath. Think. Have time to myself. I can assure you- my hubby, how ever sweet he may be, at times feels the same. So, there must be more dimensions to fill in those gaps right? Let's hope so!


We have found that these other dimensions of love are those gap fillers. Maybe you one could argue that they are even more of a foundation of love. Because really, that ga-ga stuff is more like the icing on the cake to me now. When I was younger, all I dreamed about was those things... I had no idea how much I would come to appreciate and desire these other pieces of Love.


 When I need me time, my sweet hubby is all to happy to oblige and lets me have it and vice versa.The same goes for supporting one another- even if that means temporarily or permanently putting your own desires on the back burner at times.


 Then there is that "support clause" that some don't realize they agreed to on their wedding day... I swear it's snuck somewhere in between "I promise to love, cherish, (support your feelings, needs, desires,and give it my wholehearted- best try to make sure to help you achieve your dreams), and honor you". See it's there. I promise. 


Often times, I hear people complaining about their spouses dreams, needs or wants. "Oh, he thinks he wants to go back to school". Then they just blow them off. Well, to us that is a part of the commitment. The commitment part is not just an "I'll love you and only you" commitment. It's so multi-dimensional! ( Okay, I know you get it) I hope and plan to spend the rest of my life doing my best to fulfill my true commitment to my husband. 


That commitment is to Love him, honor him in all I do (take a second to think about that- cause it's a biggie!) , support his dreams and needs, offer guidance when needed, accept his help, work as a team, listen, speak, and be okay with asking him to return that commitment to me. It can be difficult as a military wife. We are apart quite often. So, if we fail to recognize, explore, and celebrate the different dimensions of our Love- then we will have failed each other. And that is not something I'm willing to do. 


All of this has been weighing heavily on my mind lately. Commitment, sacrifice, supporting one another, etc. I truly feel like the past 9 years have been so crazy and wonderful all at the same time. However, the one thing that stays constant is my commitment to this love and this marriage. Every time I watch him walk away I thank the Lord for letting me experience those other pieces of Love so that I don't feel so lost when he leaves - because I have those things to fill in the gaps. 


I'm excited to see it all grow and flourish, each day is a new one bringing us more gifts and enlightenment. These things are even more important now with the addition of our little boy. I hope and pray that I can teach him what it took me so long to figure out on my own. 


When I started out this post, it was going in a complete different direction. I guess you go where ever you are moved to.. and thats the best place to be. Hopefully some of you that read this will understand what I meant with all this. 


My question for you: Do you experience different dimensions of love in your marriage or relationship? How has being in a committed relationship met or not met your expectations? 


Here's to a wonderful night's sleep (crossing my fingers)....


-M